http://epicpew.com/author/drummelhoff/
1. You’re there
You were at Mass, right? ‘Cause if you weren’t, this just got really awkward.
2. You arrived on time
What do you mean what do I mean by “on time”? On time, on schedule, not late, prompt, timely, punctual…Need I go on? Alright, so you didn’t arrive before the processional. No fault if you made an honest attempt. If you’ve got young kids, it’s a miracle you arrived at all. So…
3. You blessed yourself with holy water
Despite rushing in the door, dragging behind a legion of confoundingly hungry children… Um, maybe that’s just me…Either way, you remembered to dip a finger or two in the fount and bless yourself with the sign of the cross. Thank God for the force of habit, eh?
4. You listened to the readings
Listening while wrangling children is, admittedly, a relative term. But this is important, which is why you’re super attentive to the readings. You know God’s feeding you with his word before feeding you with himself. Good work!
5. You stayed awake during the homily
If you’re a convert from Protestantism, as I am, then you’ve seen plenty of examples of sleepy sermons and their victims(?) I was once one of those dozers. Since entering the Church, though, I’ve actually never experienced this, and I’ve never seen it happen. [I’m sure the brevity helps 
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]6. You said/sung the responses
It’s one thing to not sing the less than stellar selections made by the music director, but you know better than to be habitually silent during the Gloria, the Sanctus, the Agnus Dei, etc. Kudos on having them memorized too. 
7. You didn’t raise your hands during the Our Father
…because one day this past year, you read a listicle that explained that within Mass the Orans posture (hands extended to the side) is proper only to priests. Maybe nobody else noticed that you gave up copying the priest at Mass, but that’s OK. The Big Guy noticed.
8. You didn’t get distracted by people doing things wrong
That same listicle caused you to be hyper-aware of the mistaken actions everywhere at Mass for weeks afterward. But you’ve since managed to focus on simply doing things right at Mass, setting your mind on full, active participation.
9. You didn’t leave until the recessional
The world was calling, but you did not listen. What was an extra 60 seconds in the church? Maybe not much, but your priorities were rightly ordered. No rushing out for you; never a good idea to mimic Judas anyhow. Well done!